The retreat schedule

Ken: So, the schedule is 5:00 wake up, and the official retreat time is 8:49 right now. This is to prevent, as we had last time, somebody banging the gong at 4:45.

Student: So 8:49.

Ken: It’s now 8:50.

Nava: It’s not an atomic clock?

Student: Do you have seconds?

Ken: Pardon?

Nava: It’s not an atomic clock.

Ken: No, I don’t have a cesium clock. Eight five zero.

Student: This clock you can use for timing, too. So it’s set at the same time.

Ken: Actually, I’d like to have that up here when I’m talking so I can see. I’ll leave it. No, I’ll be all right. You laugh.

Ken: So we wake up at five. The hong is a 15 minute gong. This is a traditional gong, not only in the Zen tradition, which is where we’ve taken it from, but Kalu Rinpoche’s monastery used a wooden gong to call people to evening ceremonies. It’s used in the Thai tradition. The wooden gong goes way, way back.

Ken: So the gong, when you hear it, there’ll be about seven strikes at about a minute apart. And then you’ll hear something like this,[striking gong] which we call a roll down. And then after that, you’ll hear one [strikes gong] which signifies that is the first roll down. There will be three roll downs for seven minutes, then five, then three. You should be prepared in your meditation by the end of the second roll down.

Ken: Now the first period of meditation, which goes from 5:30 to 7:00, you can meditate here with everybody or you can meditate individually out on the deck, in your room, whatever. Where you meditate is optional. At 6:45, there will be another hong, another 15 minutes, which is signaling the start of group meditation. And so everybody should be here by the end of the second roll down of the 6:45 hong.

Ken: Is that clear? And then we do half an hour of meditation together, followed immediately by the morning ritual prayers, after which we go to breakfast. And then the next meditation period is at 9:30. So there is a gong at 9:15 or starts at 9:15 and goes to 9:30. And that signals the meditation period from 9:30 to 12:30.

Ken: Now, let’s go through the rest of schedule. 12:30 is lunch. At 1:45 there will be another hong which is preparing for the meditation, which will start at 2:00 and go to 4:30. We have a half hour break from 4:30 to 5 and have tea etcetera, and we meet here at 5:00 to do an evening ritual until 5:30. That evening ritual will be signalled by a gong. That’s right isn’t it, Claudia? And that goes from 5:30 to 6:00. At 6:00. We have dinner, and then there will be a gong at around 6:45 or so, signaling for teaching, which starts at 7:00. Teaching goes from seven to about 8:15 depending on the evening. We may end a little earlier or a little later after we take a short break and then meditate from approximately 8:30 to 9 together here, at which time everybody either goes to bed or goes off to individual practice, whatever they want.

Student: 5:30?

Student: If what you just said doesn’t agree with what’s on this piece of paper, which should we believe? The paper?

Ken: Yeah.

Student: [Unclear] 5 and 6. We come here at 5:00.

Ken: Oh, sorry. Yeah, that’s right. Evening rituals at 5 to 5:30. Sorry. And then dinner’s at 5:30 and then. Yeah, okay. I thought something was wrong.

Student: Group practice in the evenings. 8:15 according to the paper.

Ken: Well, yeah, but teaching is before that and so yeah. 7:00, and when the teaching starts we take a break and then start group practice. Sometimes questions have gone to a little bit later. I know some Canadians who ask a lot of questions.

Student: It’s not me.

Ken: No, it’s not you.

An unstructured schedule

Ken: There are two reasons why the schedule is as unstructured as it is. One, you’re all adults. The very strict Zen sesshin schedules where if you moved, you got beaten and so forth, particularly in the Rinzai tradition, that form developed because the Rinzai school, and to a lesser extent the Soto school, their monasteries ended up being the prep schools for the sons of the Samurai and the aristocracy. And so they had to do something to keep these young whippersnappers disciplined and adherent. And of course, they couldn’t possibly treat them any differently from anybody else. So everybody is subject to the same discipline. That’s that’s how that evolves. And I remember Dezhung Rinpoche when he was teaching us shamatha practice saying in Tibet, when they were being taught meditation, they were seated on benches and a string was strung down the length of the bench and they all were positioned so that their noses just touched the string. And every time the string moved, they all got beaten. And then he leaned forward and said, “This is not how you learn to meditate. This is how you learn to sit still.” Our interests are in meditation. So in Dzogchen and really in any direct awareness practice, suppleness of mind, which goes very, very much with suppleness of body, is extremely important.

Ken: So not only are you adults, you can regulate your practice yourself. Some of you may prefer to practice in a group. Others of you may prefer to practice individually, and you’re free to find a place outside. And I think because of the conditions, the chiggers aren’t going to be such a problem as they were last year. But if you do, I suggest you take a groundsheet so you aren’t sitting right on the grass. And a lot of people have spent a lot of meditation time meditating outside. We’ll also be doing sky-gazing, which is actually best done outside. I’ll say more about that tomorrow evening. Other people, you know, will sit out here, out on the deck. There will be some kitchen noise. We’ll keep this door closed. There’s the one big advantage of this room, which was very important in our last retreat, is it’s air conditioned and we can regulate the temperature here. So particularly in the afternoons, this is often a cooler place to be. And in this room, the format of the meditation will consistently be a half hour sitting. Each of the qi gong movements are done three times. We need someone to lead that.

Student: You can do it at 9:30. I’ll be here at 8:30. 9:30 to 12:30.

Ken: Yeah. You’re familiar enough with the movements. Okay, that’s great then. Good. So thank you. And when you get tired or if there’s a problem with that, let me know and we’ll find somebody else. All right. You know the movements, don’t you? Yeah. Gary, how are you?

Gary: No.

Ken: Gary. Gary’s fine. Yeah, he’s fine. Okay. Just come to class tomorrow. I’ll check you out. Okay. Anita. You know, the movements? Okay. So we’ve got we’ve got people who could do this and they should use this in your group. Okay.

Student: Just ask us. Yeah, it is a bit small, isn’t it? Yeah. Okay.

Ken: If you meditate for a while with the group and then feel “I don’t want to meditate,” I’ll ask you to wait until one of the half hour sessions is over so you aren’t coming and going while everybody is sitting, and then just leave quietly, close the door and that will be fine. And if you want to come in, you can listen for the gongs because there’ll be a small bell. Can you ring a small bell so they know?

Student: This one? [rings bell]

Ken: Yeah, that’s right.

Student: That’s 30 to 40 [unclear].

Ken: Yeah, it would be in that, in that range.

Go for a walk to refresh

Ken: But the idea here is, you know, some days you may feel, “I can’t meditate today.” Go for a walk. You can walk up the hill or walk down along the road, which is easier. It’s one of the reasons why I like this place because it’s very open and it’s relatively isolated. So you’re not going to run into a lot of people. But sometimes just going for a walk is a great way to refresh the body and mind so both can really rest.

Ken: Anything else I need to add on that, Okay. For each of the meditation periods, at the end of the hong, as I said, you should be in your place for meditation by the end of the second roll down. Immediately that the third roll down finishes, and the third roll down will sound like this [makes sound]. And then there’ll be [makes sound]. There’ll be three strikes at the end of the roll down. There are two, and at the end of the first one, there’s one. Then the large gong, which is this gong here, will be struck three times, slowly. And then you do the refuge and awakening mind on page seven. No, sorry, refuge and the four immeasurables on page 16, together. Whoever’s here for the meditation will read that together and at the completion of that, the small meditation bell is rung three times to start the meditation period. And then at the end of the meditation period, the small meditation bell will be rung three times. And then you do the dedication prayers, which are dedication, good fortune on page 14 or 31. They’re identical. Read those together, and then the large gong is struck three times. It is a bit warm in here. Not quite sure why. Just uncharacteristic.

Larry: Maybe, say with the large gong use the rubber studded end.

Ken: Larry’s quite right here.

Student: It’s amazing what people do with these things.

Ken: The mallet has a rubber end and a wooden end. You hit it with the wooden end. Sounds like this [makes jarring sound]. And we don’t recommend that. It’s a little jarring after a period of meditation. Hit it with the rubber end, it sounds like this [makes ringing sound]. If you hit it hard, this particular gong, it doesn’t sound very good. So, you know, you can hear that. If you hit it softly, you can do it a little louder than that, [strikes gong] it has a very nice sound. So as with all of this, it’s the same with the little gong, as with all of the timing things, the gong before the end of sessions and before teaching and the hong itself. When we’re in silence, as we will be for most of the retreat, the only way people know what’s going on is by these various sounds. So if you’re making the sounds, please do it with attention because everybody is depending on you. And I remember one morning I had no idea who it was, but they took that little gong and they were going to make sure everybody woke up. So they were banging it. And this went on for 15 minutes. [Unclear] Okay, maybe we should send out a note on that.

Student: So, Ken, just to clarify, because it’s a little confusing. The person doing the timing is going to use both the large gong and the small gong?

Ken: Or it could be two different people. The one who’s timing the meditation sessions is going to use a small gong.

Student: Okay.

Student: It’s just the initial one, the 9:30, for example, and then the 12:30 use the large one.

Ken: Yeah. So, as soon as the hong is finished, that third roll down, then this [large metal gong] is struck three times. Do the opening prayers for the meditation and then three gongs to start the meditation session.

Student: At 5:30 and at 9:30?

Ken: 9:30 and at 2:00.

Student: I thought at 5:30.

Ken: At 5:30 and at 7:00. Oh. Yeah, that’s right.

Student: This compliments the hong.

Ken: Exactly. It’ll be fine after the first day or two.

Student: I didn’t have a sign up sheet for the 7:00 at night.

Ken: Two for the teaching. Okay, so.

Student: On the sign up sheet. How do you call each gong?

Student: Well, that’s why … just … whoever signs up to do it [unclear]

Student: It would be nice to have.

Ken: You know, we didn’t have any sign up sheets for this, but it all worked out.

Student: Yeah, we’ll be fine.

Ken: I mean, whoever sits there does it. I think it was Nick. Nick and Leslie most of the time. Yeah. Yeah.

Student: If you’re the only person in the meditation room, then?

Ken: Stay. Do the timing.

Student: Just do the timing for yourself. Yeah. And do the qi gong. Because other people may come in and join you.

Daily interviews

Ken: But that was never the case in the last retreat. There’s usually quite a few people here. One person thought, “I want to go meditate by myself.” But then he came back: “There’s no energy out there. He came back so he could participate with the group energy. Okay. Now. So, I’m not going to be monitoring your meditation practice or anything like that. You’re all here to deepen your practices, as you said, and I’m just making the assumption that you know how to discipline yourself. And how to sense when you’re out of balance and so forth. And that’s one of the reasons for the daily interviews, is so that you have a chance to bring up any problems. The subject matter for the interviews, the ten minute interviews, can be summarized very succinctly. It’s questions, insights and challenges.

Student: Say that again?

Ken: Questions, insights and challenges, in your experience. So it’s very much related to your experience of practice, what’s happening. If there’s emotional material breaking, which sometimes is happening in meditation retreats, that may come up as a challenge or an insight. If it’s more elaborate or requires more history, or it’s not actually related to practice directly, that’s why the additional times have been set up. Then you see Claudia and set up a time. That way I can have a longer conversation with you about what you’re working with or questions that you have, and clarify that so that we can create the conditions for your practice. The other reason for the very unstructured approach is that direct awareness techniques, one’s ability to practice them effectively rests to a very, very high degree on your ability to rest.

Ken: How many of you have heard the fairy tale of The Princess and the Pea? This is a very important fairy tale for this retreat. There was a test of who’s a real princess: a pea was put under 100 mattresses. This one woman comes in and she complains that she couldn’t sleep all night because the bed was so uncomfortable. Well, that’s the quality of resting that we’re aiming for. You are resting that deeply in your experience. It may not be all nice and smooth. People said to me in the last retreat that they were coming in black and blue.

The subject matter of this retreat

Ken: The subject matter of this retreat isn’t working on that stuff per se. This is not like taking and sending, or the four measurables, or phowa practices, and other retreats that many of you have done with me. We’re not working on that material. But the practice consists of ultimately finding peace and clarity in those experiences. The only way that that becomes possible is to come in touch with those experiences. And that’s only possible if you actually rest, and rest very deeply. So I’m going to be putting a lot of emphasis on that resting quality.

The subject matter for this retreat is this book: Buddhahood Without Meditation, which I think I mentioned in the write-up on the website for the retreat. [Information about acquiring the book] As I’ve been re-reading this book, it’s very clear to me that the way I’m going to teach this retreat is to translate this book—even though it’s in English—into a form that’s actually usable.

One of the characteristics of the Tibetan tradition, to paraphrase something Stephen Batchelor said, “In its institutional forms, Buddhism provides very powerful answers to questions of the spirit. But sometimes the power of those answers overwhelms the stammering voice that asks the questions.” What I find when I am reading this and many other Tibetan texts is that, yes, these are very powerful answers to certain questions. And the questions are never made. So I have to play like jeopardy and come up with the questions.

I’ll just give you an example, which is where we’ll be starting in the retreat. How many of you have heard the phrase: the self of the individual and the self of phenomena? It comes out frequently in discussion. Or the ego of the individual and the ego of phenomena, it’s sometimes translated that way. Those are answers to two questions. And the two questions are: What am I? What is life? At least those are candidates for the questions. They never see those questions asked in the Tibetan tradition, or very rarely.

All you hear about is the non-self of the individual, or the non-self of phenomena or experience. What I intend to do is to present a number of questions for you to sit with. Sitting with these kinds of questions is very different from trying to answer them. And this is extremely important in terms of practice. If I ask you to ask the question of yourself: “What am I?” What happens? Anita. When you ask that question, what happens in you?

Anita: I go through a few answers that I know that my brain answers automatically … And I might have a moment of blankness.

Ken: Then what happens?

Anita: Then I have confusion.

Ken: Then what happens?

Anita: And then I know I don’t know.

Ken: This is typical. When we ask these questions like “What am I?” what actually happens is that as soon as we ask that question, we look directly at what we are. And what do you see, Anita?

Anita: Well on one level, nothing.

Ken: Yeah. We see nothing, because that’s the truth. Now, how long do we stay with that nothing? It can be measured in milliseconds. And then we panic, then we fall into confusion, and then we come up with a whole bunch of answers in our intellect. And we go through this process again and again.

The main aim of this retreat is to create the conditions—through the structure of the retreat, the meditation practice, teachings, etc.—so that you learn to be able to rest in seeing nothing, until you actually know. This is highly challenging. Your intellect is of dubious use in this retreat. There are certain things to be understood, but most of them aren’t that difficult. A tremendous number of people, unable to see, try to compensate for that by trying to understand. And it just doesn’t work.

Practice doing nothing

Ken: So a very large part of this retreat is devoted to the practice of doing nothing. So you can rest. Now, how many of you have done nothing for any extended period of time in your life? How many of you have a Protestant work ethic? It takes a real baiting in these trips. And you will be faced with such wonderful sentiments such as: “I’m not getting anywhere” or “How do I know that I’m doing it right?”

On that note, I will read this excerpt from Rangjung Dorje’s pith instruction:

You don’t need to worry or think, “Is this really mahamudra?”
Let go of any hope that it will get better or any fear that it will get worse.

That is not so easy. So this is why we have relatively large blocks of meditation or practice sessions. I hesitate to call it meditation actually, they are practice sessions. And that this is the principle instruction for this retreat: you do nothing. Carolyn?

Carolyn: What is the difference between that and meditation?

Ken: Well, there are a lot of forms of meditation. You can focus on the breath. You can rest in pristine awareness. You can meditate on the four immeasurables. You can meditate on death and impermanence. So meditation covers a whole range of activities. In this you just sit down. That’s it, do nothing. For most people, this doesn’t last very long because these thoughts come bubbling up, or body sensations arise, and they start trying to manage them. Now you’re starting to do something. Follow?

Carolyn: So you’re saying in meditation, you really mean do nothing.

Ken: I really mean do nothing. Now some of you may find that, that is simply impossible. Okay. So that’s where you start, and work with that. And that’s another reason for the interviews. It’s like, “Can’t I even calm my mind by watching my breath first?”

Student: You’re saying, don’t even do that?

Ken: This first day of the retreat, it’s a little different. All of you have travelled a significant distance to get here. And most of us leave behind relatively active and stimulating lives. So this first day of the retreat, yeah, just do resting practice in the way that you are familiar with it early tomorrow morning from breakfast to lunch. And then, tomorrow afternoon you have off to do whatever you want. That is: if you want to go for a walk, if you want to go to sleep, just whatever it is. I’ve consistently found—particularly when people travel to a retreat—that if they can just take that afternoon off and just rest and get caught up with all the travel stuff, then they can really be here for the rest of the retreat rather than trying to play catch up for nine days.

The only thing we’ll be doing in the afternoon is the han lesson. I hope we have have four or five people come learn that. And the qi gong, if you aren’t familiar with the qi gong, please come at 3:30 to go over that, because that’s an important part of this retreat practice that helps to keep balanced energies in the body. It makes it actually easier to do nothing.

Observe silence

Ken: So we’ll be observing silence from the end of teaching this evening until the end of lunch tomorrow. And then tomorrow afternoon is completely open. And then we’ll have dinner together and then the teachings. And then after teaching tomorrow night, we will practice silence for the rest of the retreat up till Friday. Now, the practice of silence is extremely important in this kind of practice because one of the ways that we discharge energy, one of the ways that we dissipate attention, one of the ways that we get away from our experience, is by talking.

So I’m going to ask you to practice silence even in your rooms, even if you’re rooming with your partner, don’t talk. With the cleanup, there may be a certain amount of functional talking that’s necessary. You limit that to asking the essential question. And if you’re giving the explanation, you’re straight to the point, you don’t go into a lot of elaboration. So it’s really like one sentence, and only if it’s absolutely necessary.

[Further discussion about keeping silence]

Ken: Many of you will have practices that you are doing on a regular basis. Take one of the meditation sessions—it doesn’t have to be the first one, but take one of the half hour sessions—and do your regular practice so that you keep that going during the retreat. Outside of that, then you’re going to just rest in your experience. And sometimes resting in your experience isn’t very restful as some of you know already. But that’s the practice.

As we go on in the retreat and through the interviews, I will be helping you to shape your practice so that it is effective and productive. This idea of letting go of working a technique is actually very, very important in both mahamudra and dzogchen, particularly important in dzogchen. It’s quite possible to work various techniques so you create very specific mind states. There are many forms or training which do this, and they are very helpful and powerful for bringing out certain kinds of experience.

What we’re really focusing on here is creating the conditions so that you find the nature of experience in experience itself. For this, the quality of resting—which as we’ll talk about as we go through the retreat—matures into the quality of resting and seeing. But the way that we’re approaching it here is, that’s going to be a natural evolution. Okay. So I think that’s everything I wanted to cover this evening. [More retreat logistics]